GALAT

I'm back with another shitty post on this shitty blog. Now as usual, the first paragraph will be full of intense self loathing. :D I started this for monetary purposes. But google was like.. Bro.. Write some similar content so that we can place ads. I said.. Back off Google.. I'll write random stuff. From then Me and google have some fierce rivalry between us. So what if google doesn't support ads here, My Mom still Loves me. :P

So whenever I get bored of humans and stuff I open this page and start writing random things.  So as usual I lay on my bed and elevate my legs to 60 degrees, and then put laptop on them, and it will be of no use if what I write doesn't bring a smile on reader's face. So after the grand success of 'What's wrong' in the posts Bhonda and Fugly, with both of the posts having 2 and 3 hits each (:p) , presenting the third one, "GALAT"

Shhoba bole players ko selfie ki padi hai
Sakshi aur Sindhu medal le ke khadi hai
Dipa ne bhi sabko deewana banaya
Shobha Ji ki GALATfehmi kitni badi hai

Idhar neta movie review de raha hai
Udhar Twitter jamke maze le raha hai
Wifi wala waada to khud naa nibhaya
Aur saste 4G ko GALAT keh raha hai

Patthar fekte ho Sena pe humaari
Kaha se hai pakdi ye GALAT beemari
Topo aur goliyo se bhi na dare jo
Tera patthar unpe padega na bhari

Footpath pe bhai ne chala di car
Kaale hiran ka bhi kiya shikaar
Fir bhi khula ghoome super-star
Wah kanoon kya GALAT kiya yaar

46  ke Pappu ko Yuva Soch Rahe hain..
Yuva leader ke liye bal noch rahe hain
Aur jinki hai umar ye karne ki Ghalib..
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Wo yuva humare Pokemon khoj rahe hain..


That's all folks :D

Don't bother to +1/Like/Share.. Google ain't giving me any money :P. Just kidding.. Do it.

Yeh Fugly Fugly Kya Hai

Its said that you've to know your audience. So I decided to be like my audience, and hence I myself did not open the blog for a very long time. Anyways, its got a shitty name :D

But few in India don't want this place to be shut forever and hence do some stupid shit, so that I can write about them :P
They tried very hard but only few made it to the post. Rest Rakhi Sawant, Ramdev Baba, Salman Khan(oops sorry, his driver), and other brilliant minds who think saying "Bharat Mata ki Jai" is a shame, will soon be given limelight.

If I'm not the only one smiling while writing this, man I'm on fire.. Else..  screw you, my mom likes me very much.

So writing the Part 2 of what's wrong, what's bhonda, what's fugly...

Now, obviously you haven't seen part1 so here is the link for the same.  I got familiar with a word भौकाल , and realized that when mixed with hindi, the below content is more भौकालish..
I have also copied rhyme from original song, cuz.. huh.. screw you.. My mom loves me.. :P
I hope you won't like/+1/share as it's against the author's good.

So here it goes..


ये फग्ली फग्ली क्या है
ये फग्ली फग्ली क्या है
ये फग्ली फग्ली क्या है
ये फग्ली फग्ली..

घोड़े को ज़ोर से कूटना
वैट के नाम पे लूटना
पप्पू का भाषण रटना
या JNU की घटना

बिल्डिंग पे चढ़ के चीटिंग
फूफाजी  कालिंग इन  मीटिंग
मोगली की U/A रेटिंग
मस्तीज़ादे से नो हेटिंग

हम सारी बाते जाने
फिर भी हम बात न माने
खुद ही बनते अनजाने, पूछे
फग्ली फग्ली क्या है..

Uber ने 4X ठानी
और ऑटो की मनमानी
ब्लॉग पे हिट्स न आना
और ताहेर शाह का गाना

हर्षा भोगले, हटाया
सिद्धू को बीच में लाया
सिद्धू के मन को भाया
दिमाग नोच के खाया

बिन सोचे बदले डीपी
कहते FB का है ट्रेंड;
यू आर ए परफेक्ट गाय
बट आई लाइक यू एस ए फ्रेंड

हम सारी बाते जाने
फिर भी हम बात न माने
खुद ही बनते अनजाने, पूछे..
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फग्ली फग्ली क्या है.. 


BTW..



 भारत माता की  जय 

Priye!!

Its been a while since I have posted something, and its been too long since someone even opened the blog :D
Anyways, when you get bored in the train and there are annoying kids around, all you can do is plug the earphones in, and ignore the world. But what if the annoying kids shout very much and even take your earphones?

I went to the upper berth and thought of a random stuff and wrote something. Sharing the same with you.. Please ignore this one as well like the others. Don't even bother to +1 or like, you don't, anyways.. :D

Priye..

Mai kora kaagaz dustbin ka
Tum samsung galaxy ka note priye

Mai bihar chunaav me bhaajpa sa
Tum le gyi saare vote priye

Mai karele ka kadwa sa ras
Tum shakkar ki mithaas priye

Mai do by do ka kamra hoon
Tum ho deewan-e-khaas priye..

Tum Enrique ka madhur sa gaana
Mai altaaf raja ki ghazal priye

Tum cornflakes ki deewani ho
Mai kaale chane ki fasal priye

Tum lgti ho  iOS wali
Mai symbian ka phone priye

Tum 3G 4G LTE
Mai no network ka zone priye

Tum delhi metro ka pehla coach
Mai dadar local ka dabba priye

Tum ho pasta ka white sauce..
Mai aavle ka murabba priye

Har jagah dekha har jagah dhundha
Na tumsa koi haseen priye

Tum sab sach maan kar hasne wali
Mai jhut bolne ki machine priye...

Mumbai: The City Has It All

Its Chennai Super Kings vs Mumbai Indians today. Though I'm a die hard fan of Chennai Super Kings, I,m sharing something about Mumbai. This I realized last year when I was there. Nearly one year went past when I left Mumbai..
But,

You can take the boy out of Bombay, but You cannot take out Bombay out of the boy

Mumbai: The City Has It All

Just re-sharing something I wrote about Mumbai last year..

Barish me bheegne ka mann nahi karta
Par Marine Drive ki high tide me bheegna accha lagta hai...

8:20 ki JD passenger ki bheed pasand nahi
Par Dadar-Kurla ki bheed dekh kar accha lagta hai...

Raipur se bus me Bhilai jaane me sar dard karta tha
Par BEST ki bus me khada rehna accha lagta hai..

Demand to hum originality se niche ki karte hi nhi..
Par fashion street se duplicate jersey lena accha lagta hai..

Zameen pe dekh k chalne ki aadat hai
Par badi badi imaaratein dekh k accha lagta hai..

Is mumbai me..
Ameer din raat bas paise paise kar ke rota hai
Aur gareeb bin paise haste haste sadko pe sota hai..

Qki..
Yeh mumbai hai.. Yahaan aisaicch hota hai :D

Bhonda is the new Fugly

It doesn't matter how I collect ideas which create a Kumbh Mela in mind and persuade me to create a new post, or how I lay on my bed and elevate my legs to 60 degrees and then use laptop on them, if it doesn't bring a smile on someone's face. So here is another attempt to do so.

So I heard this word BHONDA two years ago from my friend. While it seemed very catchy, but on the other side of the coin, it also sounded like a slang. Well its not. 

The meaning of this word is as easy as to explain the meaning of Jalebi to an American. Many do research works in their area of interest in last year of the college. I did research on this word. Its equivalent of  FUGLY, from the song itself. Keep the tune in mind while reading.

Here is what I found :) Take some time and enjoy.. 

Ye bhonda bhonda kya hai

Ye bhonda bhonda kya hai

Ye bhonda bhonda kya hai

Ye bhonda bhonda kya hai

Tooti footi angrezi

Reply karne me lazy

Jaate khulle me shauchalay

Aur swacchta ke liye crazy

Sadko pe gehre gaddhay

Exam ke din me birthday

Chahe rakhi ka swayavwar

Ya train me likhna number 

Hum saari baatein jaane

Fir bhi hum baat na maane

Khud hi bante anjaane puche

BHONDA BHONDA kya hai

Toothpaste me namak mirchi

Ya naap bigaade darzi

Spam link ho ya pop up

Ya ho delta toolbar k marzi

Ladki ki farzi id

Dinbhar sony pe cid;

Teacher ki class me tarr tarr

All-out na maare macchar

Lambe lambe assignmment

Khaa gaye baki enjoyment

Saari raat banao fir bhi

Saali milti disappointment

Hum saari baatein jaane

Fir bhi hum baat na maane

Khud hi bante anjaane puche

BHONDA BHONDA kya hai

Thanks :)

Keep Visiting.. Subscribe n Share else you're also bhonda :p

Farewell To Seniors- The Nerd way

Bas socha humne ki kuch khaas kiya jaye..
In panktiyo k sath kavita ka aagaz kiya jaye

Is kavita me bhi ab aap computer ka style dekho
Chand shabdon ko kaise kiya humne 'compile' dekho

Jab hum juniors ban k aate hain to hume college life seniors hi sikhaate hain.. Agli kuch lines ek junior ka safar senior k saath darshati hain..
Panktiya padhta hu,

Ke Hum sab ne aapse bahut kuch cheezein paayi hai
College ki 'cin-cout' hume aapne hi to sikhayi hai

Aur hui thi shuruaat in yadgaar silsiloon ki
Jab kholi thi aapne 'windows' apne diloon ki

Aankho me bade bade sapno ki train liye
Ek safar shuru kiya tha 'void brain()' liye
Raaste me aapke naye chehro se mulakaat ho gayi
Aisa 'program' bana jisse khushiyo ki barsaat ho gayi
Wo din hume chahne wale dost de gaye,
Wo lamhe bhula na pane waale log de gaye

Tab se is safar me bahut yaadein judi meethi meethi
Kabhi canteen me treat hui to  kabhi cheating in CT
Yaadein bhi aisi aisi ki dil aur man ko choo le
Jaise aapki welcome party ko hum ab tak nahi bhoole

Jo lamhe zindagi ke anmol pal ban gaye
Wo ab aankho k jal ban jayenge
Kaash un lamho ko hum fir se jee paate
Wo lamhe ab guzre hue kal ban jayenge

Koi jayenge banglooore, to koi jayenge pune
Par aapke bin lagenge ye corridor soone soone
Yaad rakhna ki kar to doge aap hume bye bye
Par roz yaad ayegi aapko lakhan bhaiya ki chai


Bas Jagah badal rahe ho aap,
Dil me koi dooriee nahi hai
Dil me ho, chahe jab milo
Fasle hain par majboori nahi hai

Ye waada hai aapse
Rishta hamara badhta jayega...
Dosti hamari badhti jayegi...
Kyuki is dosti ko hum har din streCH karte hai..
Is hi waade k sath is kavita ko 'get-CH()' karte hain....

Kaviyo ki Chai

Ek kavita pesh karta hu, aur chai k kisse sunaata hu,
Dekhiye kaviyo ki chai kaisi hoti hai

College aate hi yaad aaye wo subah ki chay
Chalo aaj bhi wo chai canteen me pi jaye

Nikaal k thodi si fursat, chod k saare kaam..
Deta tha canteen me dastak, aur kehta tha Raam Raam

Sunaakar koi dilchasp si baat,
Chai peeta tha dosto k sath

Un dino canteen me lakhan bhaiya kaam karte hai aur aunty chai banati thi

Kehta tha aunty k hatho me jaadu hai yaar
Har din prakat karta tha yahi vichaar
Aunty mere shabd sun sun mand mand muskaati thi
Jab bhi canteen padhaaru, badhia chai pilati thi

Muft ki chai me kaam chalaata tha
Parking ki parchi k paise bachata tha

Dheere dheere lakhan bhaiya mujhe jaan gaye..
Muftkhori meri wo pehchan gaye
Fir hona kya tha, ulti hawaein chalne lagi
Paristithi tezi se badalne lagi

Fir jab bhi canteen jata tha..
Aur mast kissa sunaata tha
Wo kehte kissa to ekdum sahi hai..
Par Abhishek Babu.. Chai patti nahi hai

Maine socha isse pehle paristithi aur bigadti jaaye
Chai k liye nayi tikdam rachi jaaye

Pucha maine lakhan bhaiya se,
Yaad hai apan kab mile the???

Wo bhi shayar kism ka insaan nikla, bola..

Us din ghar se nikalte hi
Cheenk mujhe bekhabar aayi..
Thoda aage chala jo mai
To kaali billi nazar aayi..
Mai ye sab maanta na tha, so aage badhta gaya...
                                     Bassssss... Us hi din meri mujhse teri mulaqaat ho gayi.....
                                     AUR TAB SE MAI KATTAR  ANDHVISHWASI  HOON

Maano ya na maano
Baat kar raha hu ekdum khari ekdum sach...
Aur kavita padhne k liye
Thank u very very much.. 

Kya Khoob The Wo Din - Eclectika 2k13

Kaviyo k baare me bata du ki..

Kaviyo k 3 dushmano ka gyan to hona hi chahiye..
1.Ande 2.Tamaatar 3. Joote..

Par mehengai ne aam admi ki jeb ko aisa marooda hai
Ande tamatar door ki baat, dhaniya layak nahi choda hai
                 //Toh bach gaye bas joote

Jooto par likhna bade saahas ka kam hai
Iski qabiliyat ko mera dil se salaam hai..

Kyuki..
Joota sansadiya hai, sansad me chalta hai..
Yahi to wo hathiyar hai jo bina liscence milta hai

Pairo me pehno to hai pairo ka gehna
Haatho me aa jaye laale fir to kya kehna

Joote aur insaan ka, yahi samikaran nikalta hai..
             
Ki joote aur insaan ka, yahi samikaran nikalta hai..
Kabhi aadmi joote par, kabhi aadmi pe joota chalta hai..
             
To aaj yaha apke samne, sunaakar apna raag jaunga..
Aur kisi ne joota feka gar.. Kasam se joota lekar bhag jaunga
             //Ab fek k dikhaao

Aage jo sunaane ja raha hu wo kavita mere mere college ke pehle saal pe adhaarit hai,
Mujhe ummeed hai, ki in panktiyo me ap kahi na kahi khud ko paaoge,

Title hai, Kya khoob the wo din..

Kya khoob the wo din.. Jab josh me college aate the
Late ho b jaye agar, to bhilai ka bahana banate the..

Kya khoob the wo din.. Jab computer lab jate the
Teacher na ho lab me agr, to book kholk baith jate the..
 Faculty members soch rahe honge mai kis book ki baat kar raha hu, MAI FACEBOOK KI BAAT KAR RAHA HU


Chemistry practical me.. Jab test tube toot jaate the..
Teacher k dekhne se pehle usko wash basin me bahate the..

Kya khoob the wo din.. Jab communication skills sikhate the..
Samne wale speech dete the.. Peeche wale khurrrrrrrrr... So jate the

Kya khoob the wo din.. Jab ed ki sheet banate the..
Mini drafter kon set kare.. Hum to roller scale chalate the..

Electrical ki lab me.. Bas taar jodna padta tha...
Aur mechanical ki reading k liye.. Bas wazan tolna padta tha..

Agli lines k liye taiyar rehna ye civil lab pe hai..

Kya khoob the wo din.. Jab civil lab hum jaate the..
Compass kholna nahi aata tha.. Par survey kar ke aate the..

Aaj bhi wo pal yaad karu to
Man mera muskaata hai
Chand saal beet gaye ho zaroor
Par yaad samay wo aata hai

Kuch yaadein yaad hai, Kuch kho gayi haai...
Taaliya baja bhi do kavita khatm ho gayi hai...